My hands are handcuffed to my brain, my fingers are tied up with my toes and my heart is heavy by the seconds.
I'm 22 and I've achieved nothing. Nothing beats the idea of having nothing to lose, nothing to gain, when all you got is a glass of strawberry jam. A wholemeal bread to go with your half boiled eggs and they are done half fuck. My hands are handcuffed, I can feel myself feeling restricted with all the restricted files and documents around me. I'm not in office, I'm at my house, laying on top of my bed, looking at a screen. My hands are handcuffed by the thought of freedom. Freedom will never bring you anywhere because with full freedom, you have no restrictions and you can do whatever you want to do like buying a gun and kill your own son. Well, I love full freedom in a sense I am able to explore the mediums to express myself fully through words and visuals through words and visuals. My eyes are getting heavier too so after I let my finger do the freedom-talking, I'm going straight to bed. I don't have the freedom now. I may never have full freedom in my lifetime which is kinda sad because I will never get to know how it feels like being an American and living in Compton. My fingers and toes are tied up together and I'm at a foetus position, outside of my mother's womb but I'm still close to her like I'm outside my mother's womb. When I die, handcraft me a tomb, tall enough for the rest to see where I lay down as mud. More money more problems, that's the way it goes. With that being said, the less money you have, also means the more problems you have. You can't buy contraceptive pills and Redbull and all you survive on is yesterday's food. I need a holiday, where I can express myself fully with full freedom and unlimited supply of moo-lah in a foreign country like Africa and visit the pyramid and build one for myself. My ego is worth a pyramid, my ego is just an expression how I treat others when I feel threatened and I'm on a defensive mature mode. This paragraph may be gibberish but 5 years down the road, when I read this, I will fully understand the true meaning of the day when they say the world is going to end.